My name is Mary Masterson and up until recently I was a psychiatrist and head of department for the National Mental Health Organization. My main job was adminis- trative but I always had a few projects running to keep the little gray cells pliant. Actually one of those projects is the subject of my story tonight.
I had a schizophrenic subject that I'd been working with for almost a year when the incedent took place. All he did during his waking hours was stomp around in his cell chanting unintelligible words. He was naked and without footwear due to past incidents that required emergency care.
The subject's name was Marvin he was of Jewish decent and had just turned 30 years old. Marvin's parents had institutionalized him at 15 and he never saw the outside again.
My project was to find out if outside stimulus would somehow break the cycle of chanting and stomping. It was almost hypnotizing to watch him stomping around naked and chanting incessantly. I would sit there for hours and watch him doing it.
I have to admit that I was fascinated with Marvin. His body was well developed and other than his strange behavior he was physically attractive. From the first I thought what a shame; here was a young man with a healthy good-looking body and his mind was completely lost to the world.
It was a Saturday afternoon when I found myself sitting in the viewing room all by myself watching Marvin stomping around. As usual he was muttering some un- intelligible words and looking at the floor. I could see his penis swaying in rhythm with his moving feet, his rather well endowed balls also swung in time with his movements.
It was an idle thought at first. 'Had Marvin ever been aroused? Could he be?' That little thought grew into a full-fledged question as I watched his male organs swing between his muscular legs as he continued his mindless stomping.
What was I thinking? I jerked out of my reverie and began taking time notes, checking on his verbalizations and respiration. But my thoughts drifted back to Marvin's penis as I watched it swinging away. I had a real curiosity now, 'could he get hard like any other male?'
I can't believe how unprofessional I was to do what I did next but I decided I had to find out. The only other people in the facility were the guards at the gate and a few custodial personnel cleaning the offices and halls. So I decided to take a chance.
I walked into Marvin's cell and began to talk to him. This always seemed to have a calming effect on him. The only difference that day was that I stood close to him, so close in fact, that I could actually feel the heat radiating from his body. After all he'd been marching around chanting for almost 3 hours by then.
He smelled like a man aroused. You know that special smell. For some reason Marvin always had that smell within an hour or so after his shower. I had always liked that smell, it didn't disgust me, it acted as a strange attractant to me.
As I talked gently to Marvin I casually reached out and grasped his penis. He immediately stopped his stomping and chanting and stood stock-still. I slowly massaged his penis, even reaching down a little further to touch his hanging balls.
All I was trying to do was stimulate him into some kind of arousal, I don't think I was thinking that anything would really get through to him, but I wanted to see. I was amazed that he'd stopped moving and seemed to be letting me touch him without protest.
I moved up closer to him still reaching down and massaging his manhood. Finally I began to masturbate him. He still wasn't showing any signs of arousal and I was about ready to stop and head back to the observation room when I felt a definite hardening of his shaft.
I stopped and stood back to watch his reaction. I was amazed. I'd finally gotten through to him, physical contact had done what drugs and laboratory experiments hadn't. They had stopped his incessant stomping and chanting. And now his arousal was obvious.
For a 30-year-old male he had nothing to be ashamed of in the sex equipment department. No one would argue that. It was just having seen him day after day with a flaccid penis in contrast to the rising staff that was growing all the while as I watched, was surprising. I didn't say or do anything else to stimulate Marvin yet his erection quivered into life like no other man I'd seen before.
Then without warning he jumped at me, scaring the hell out of me. I felt his strong grip on my arm and felt his other hand ripping at my clothing. What was happening? Fear mixed with excitement rushed through my veins like fire as Marvin began chanting louder now as he frantically held me and ripped at my clothing.
I felt like I was being mauled by a simian-man, be grunted and gurgled as he pawed me. I didn't know what to do; I just tried to pull away. That was the wrong thing to do. Marvin began to pummel me with his fists. I shrank back against the wall and slowly crumpled to the floor under a hail of plows.
Then he was hovering over me, his big erection poking at me like a mad serpent. Then he was on me again, tearing and ripping my clothing away. Then he was shoving me over onto my back. If I made any move to resist him he would land a few frantic blows to my head to subdue me.
I screamed in fear when he climbed on top of me and began to madly thrust at me. It was obvious that he was trying to rape me. I knew that he'd never had a sexual response before, his records were complete and I knew this was his first attack of its kind.
I was revolted as his sweaty body came down hard on mine and screamed again as he thrust his huge shaft deep into me with one try. There was pain at first. Marvin wasn't a sophisticated lover. In fact I'm still not sure if he really knew what he was doing. I think much of what happened was instinct and nothing more. In the wild a male's instinct to reproduce is strong, the only dif- ference between men and animals is that men usually can control their instincts with their intellect.
Marvin had none of these inhibitions as he mounted me like a wild man and began to thrust into me like a crazed animal, occasionally hitting me with his clenched fist in his lust to dominate me.
I felt dazed and repulsed by his attack on me, his rough violation of my body and the obvious exhilaration he was experiencing in his dominance over me. I just lay there under him taking his thrusts and blows hoping that it would soon be over. I wasn't on the pill and what was happening to me could be disastrous; there was nothing I could do to stop this man so I just closed my eyes and took it.
Only a short time ago I was the one in charge, then I made my mistake and touched him where I shouldn't have, this was all my fault.
Then I felt Marvin thrust extra hard into me and then hold himself tightly to my groin. His body shivered once and he grunted and began to frantically thrust in and out of me again. 'Oh my god, I thought, the bastards coming in me and there's nothing I can do to stop him,' I thought with a frantic feeling deep down inside
Finally Marvin stopped his frantic fucking motions and became a heavy weight on top of me. I could feel his erection shrinking inside me and knew that he'd obtained his goal. I was humiliated and filled with disgust, but somewhere deep down inside of my soul I was also aroused by the animal dominance that Marvin had displayed toward me.
I'd always been the one in charge, the one leading my partners to do what I wanted, when I wanted it. This had been a completely new experience for me, the total dominance over me by another. No matter that the man was a loon, no matter that I was bruised and battered, and maybe pregnant by him.
I was able to get away from Marvin after he fell into a contented sleep, and I managed to find a lab coat to cover my bruised naked body and make my way home. I had to call in sick on Monday and even had to make excuses for the bruises on my face when I finally did show up for work.
I could have gotten away with what happened because miraculously no one found out about the incident in Marvin's cell that Saturday afternoon.
Were I went terribly wrong was when I did the same thing the next Saturday. What a stupid thing to do, but I had to do it. It was like my body had a mind of it's own. I just had to experience Marvin's animal dominance again.
I even made sure that I was naked so I wouldn't have to leave the facility naked as before. That second time was even better than the first for me. I'd planned it, I knew what I was in for and I was looking forward to it.
His arousal was out of control again and I was soon on my back with a wild animal implanting his sperm between my legs. It was a glorious feeling, I was so alive. The feeling of complete dominance over me by someone who would kill me if I fought too hard made me come my brains out that afternoon.
Why I never used birth control is still a mystery to me. I knew I should have but I didn't and after the 5th time I let Marvin take me down to the floor of his cell I knew I was pregnant. But even then I couldn't stop what I'd started. I began to worry that Marvin was becoming more aggressive during regular lab hours with females.
Then the day came when Marvin got out of control on a Wednesday when everyone was there. He took Wendy Johnson the pharisaic nurse down to the floor of his cell. She'd come into his cell to get a blood sample and had ignored my warning posted on the door to his cell not to enter without me there. I'd issued instructions to that effect to everyone once I realized that Marvin was becoming used to his role as a dominant.
Marvin actually was able to get off in Wendy before the staff was able to pull him off her. There was no way they could pull them apart while he was screwing her, he just became more violent and began bashing the poor girl's head against the floor until the staff backed off until he was finished with her.
After the incedent with Wendy the whole story came out and I had to resign. Now 5 years later I a single mom with a son and we live in the back woods of Kentucky. The notoriety of that incident at the center was just too much for me to take and I've been in semi-hiding ever since.
My only fear now is what will my son turn out to be like. Will he inherit his father's traits? I guess only time will tell.